Isn’t it appropriate that the month when the taxes are due begins with April Fool’s Day and ends with cries of “May Day!”?

Do you ever wonder if automation will ever replace the taxpayer?If my business gets much worse, I won’t have to lie on my next tax return.

Drive carefully. Malaysia needs every taxpayer it can get.

Children may be deductible, but they are still taxing.

There is no child so bad that he/she can’t be used as an income tax deduction.

The path of civilization is paved with tax receipts.

The wealth of experience is one possession that hasn’t been taxed . . . .yet.

A fool and his money are soon parted. The rest of us wait until income tax time.

This country is as free today as it ever was. . . unless, of course, you happen to be a taxpayer.

Golf is a lot like taxes. You drive hard to get to the green and then wind up in the hole.

Some people think the government owes them a living. The rest of us would gladly settle for a small tax refund.

Our government really takes care of us. They even give us free income tax forms.

Everybody works for the government, either on the payroll or the taxroll.

The honeymoon is over when the bride begins to feel like she was never anything but a tax deduction to him.

Nothing makes a person more modest about their income than to fill out a tax form.

The income tax forms have been simplified beyond all understanding.

It’s too bad for the middle income person. They earn too much to avoid paying taxes and make too little to afford paying them.

It’s strange how a person with no sense of humor can come up with such funny answers on his/her tax return.

When making out your tax return, it’s better to give than to deceive.

I hate junk mail . . .and that includes the tax forms they send me.

When it comes to income tax, most of us would be willing to pay as we go if we could only catch up on where we’ve been.

An income tax return is like a girdle. If you put the wrong figure in it your are likely to get pinched.

After a man pays his income tax, he knows how a cow feels after she’s been milked.

The latest income-tax form has been greatly simplified. It consists of only three parts: (1)

How much did you make last year? (2) How much have you got left? (3) Send amount listed in part 2.

About the time a man is cured of swearing, another income tax is due.

Nothing has done more to stimulate the writing of fiction than the itemized deduction section of the income-tax forms.

If you want to get even with the income-tax people, get Junior to work out your tax return using the new math.

The average man knows as much about the atomic bomb as he does about his income-tax form.

Income taxes are not so bad and certainly could be worse.

What the present income-tax form needs is a section which would explain the explanations.

Some of us can recall the day when a person who had to pay income tax was considered to be wealthy.

Behind every successful man stands a woman and the IRB. One takes the credit, and the other takes the cash.

A harp is a piano after taxes.

A man admitted he lied on his income-tax return - he listed himself as the head of the household!

Life is one dodge after another - cars, taxes, and responsibilities.

The way the cost of living and taxes are today, you might as well marry for love.

Of course you can’t take it with you, and with high taxes, lawyer’s fees, and funeral expenses you can’t leave it behind either.

The reward for saving money is being able to pay our taxes without borrowing.

If science says nothing is impossible, how about a mechanical taxpayer?

Science has increased our life span considerably. Now we can look forward to paying our taxes at least ten years longer.

Taxation is a lot like sheep shearing. As long as you shear a sheep it will continue to produce a new crop of wool. But you can skin the animal only once.

When it comes to a tax reduction, never has so little been waited for by so many for so long.

We wonder why they call them “tax returns” when so little of it does.

The best things in life are still free, but the tax experts are working overtime on the problem.

I know a man who says he’s going to invest his money in taxes - it’s the only sure
thing to go up.

Old taxes never die - they just change their names.

Nowadays anybody who puts two and two together also has to add in the sales tax.

Death and taxes are inevitable, but death doesn’t repeat itself.

By the time you finish paying all your taxes, about all you have left is a receipt.

No matter how staggering the taxes, they never fall down.

Everything we have is taxed - even our patience.